BFP Volume 9

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Nerd's Fantasy

 

The history of the print version of the Birmingham Free Press is one of fits and starts. Having no fixed schedule we can never go out of business. But we are back on the streets now and you can find a copy in one of our boxes around the city or at your favorite watering hole, or even your favorite bar. The paper should be at any of your favorite haunts and many places you might not have haunted.

Though it is a bit of a stretch to consider this newspaper a business beyond the fact that I write off all of our loses on my income tax. It has been a while since our last issue as Lee has run off to become a mountain man, David has been overwhelmed with graduate school, and Brent has been, well, Brent.

Personally, I have been working 24 hours a day illustrating a series of children’s books and painting a 100 by 30 foot mural on 5th Avenue North across the street from the Redmount Hotel (this, of course, between secret agent gigs and flings with various countesses and Hollywood starlets).

We have remained busy online and through our various other outlets valiantly determined to find that happy medium between originality and comprehensibility that is the primary goal of the BFP. If you completely understand it, it is too clichéd, and if it is too innovative, no one has a clue what they are looking at. But now, low and behold, we are back in print again. As classic broadsheets are disappearing across the country we still remain the guiding light of what a newspaper could and should be. And as for you punk kids who have been trashing our newspaper boxes—we’re coming for you.

As usual, no one has risen to the task of selling advertising. Brilliant creative types like ourselves aren’t particularly adept at asking people for money, and demanding money is regrettably frowned upon.

Fortunately we have a group of dedicated sponsors who believe in what we are doing—whatever that may be—who have contributed funds towards getting us in print again. Considering the compromises that would have to be made to make the Birmingham Free Press a commercial venture rather than an art project, more donations are encouraged. In fact, you are welcome to sell everything you own and hand the proceeds over to us. Don’t worry; you’ll bounce back. Think of the good you’ll be doing. It’s also not tax deductible because we tend to be so political. As you can imagine, it is this sort of painfully honest sales pitch that has kept us in the red.

Please click on the donate button on the top right of this page to join the kindly and supportive folks who help keep our print edition on the streets. All major credit cards are accepted. No amount is too small and certainly no amount is too large. Possibly you might consider taking out a second mortgage on your house or selling your hair. No sacrifice you could make for us is too great.

-Stephen

Donors or $100 of More will Receive
an Official, and Highly Coveted,
Birmingham Free Press Fedora

November 2012

 
 

Birmingham Free Press Office

© 2012 The Birmingham Free Press