Bat-Fan Lives up to Hero’s Image
By Cub Reporter Bear Bryant

First of all you have to imagine this drama queen dressed up in a Barbarella costume. The whole nine yards, her right breast was covered by nothing more than a clear plastic breast shaped container. "So all of a sudden you think you’re in a science fiction movie and this monster jumps right out of the sewer," said Jane. "No kidding. He throws the manhole cover off over his head and jumps on top of me and starts gnawing at my ankle like a drumstick."

Lucky for her some guy in a Batman costume was packing heat. He shot that sad monster way more than was necessary.